Resonance and goodbye

I had a dream last night.

I had a dream about my first flame.
I feel terribly guilty whenever think about it. Because, obviously, I'm happily married now.
But, it's not like the mushy, I-miss-him kinda dream.
It was a parting, for us.
It was a farewell, between us.
After all these years, this is my first time having a dream of him, saying goodbye and returning something to me.

I always knew that he was special because we loved each other deeply, we developed strong and lasting memories. I knew that for sure. That vibration of feelings, the resonance we both share is a special mixture.

In previous years, he would randomly appeared in my dreams but it was mute dream. No talking and even he'd said something, I couldn't hear his voice. But normally, he will just appear, just like that. I assumed maybe he was having feelings of memory or nostalgia which I sub-conscious, or my higher self was receiving.

But in last night's dream, I can hear his voice clearly. He was holding something but I couldn't recall what it was. That thing look familiar to me, like I knew what it was and it was something that I gave to him. So he returned it back to me. He said it clearly, "I don't need this anymore. I'm returning this to you." and I just stood there until he turned his back on me and walk away.

I don't know whether I'm supposed to feel sad but I kinda feel... I don't know how to describe this feeling but I guess that's how letting go feels like? My heart got struck a bit yet I didn't reach out for him neither call his name. At the same time, my heart felt ready to see him go...

Dear Al,
I wish you and family all the happiness in the world. I hope we both will be the best true love to our partners because they deserved it. They deserve the best version of us.